Healing Through Breastfeeding

First Latch

It's World Breastfeeding Week, and I wanted to take a little time to share with you my breastfeeding story.  I am very lucky I have been blessed with an easy breastfeeding journey; it's what helped Jellybean and I bond, and it was the balm that helped sooth the emotional wound from her birth.  In the hour between when she was born via cesarian section and when I finally got to hold her I felt like my body had failed me, and that I had failed her. In the happiness of having her safely here I was depressed and a little angry.  And honestly those feeling continues for more than a few months past her birth.  But the moment she was placed in my arms she nuzzled in close and latched without much help.  I felt relieved, I felt elated, I felt like I could in fact do this mothering thing, despite the extra intervention to get her here.  I still worried that somehow her birth would leave a mark on our relationship, that some how we would not fully bond.  She has proven me wrong.

Nursing a Toddler

Not only did my champion nursling take to the breast easily
, but my milk came in quickly. With in a week she was over her birth weight.  We never suffered thrush, clogged ducts or nipple confusion.  Her and I became a fairly inseparable pair.  Even though she willingly went to other people to play and socialize when she was tired or hungry there was only one answer and one person she wanted, Mama and her milk. Our biggest nursing hurtle was trying to get her to take
a bottle or a binky, she never really took to a bottle and only picked up the binky as a toddler when she started weaning.  I was fortunate to breastfeed her a few weeks past her second birthday before my body decided it needed to focus on feeding the little baby growing inside my belly and not the wiggly little girl on my lap.  I look forward to being able to nourish and bond with another little nursling, and pray that it will go as smoothly as my journey with Jellybean.

It has been a few months since she fully weaned, and while she will now except others for comfort she is still my ever companion.  And if she could articulate it properly I think she would tell you that she is part of me, or that I am part of her.  But either way we are an extension of each other, and that is more than just because I am her mother.